Snow snow and more snow

I'm almost tempted to give up shovelling all the snow that falls.  I work for an hour each day and then the next day it's back to how it was.  I'm starting to believe the old story about how Canada was colonized.  What happened was everyone lived somewhere warm like Texas or Arizona or something.  One day, a man went up North to see what it was like.  He discovered that it was very very very........very cold and very very............very snowy.  He quickly went back down south.  He then waited until the summer.  When the summer came around he told all of his friends - as a practical joke - that they should all go up North because it was very beautiful up there.  They all went to check it out.  When they arrived they discovered the Rocky Mountains and the prairies and agreed that it was beautiful.  Then they discovered Ontario (which is from a word they invented meaning mud) and quickly ran back to British Columbia, Alberta, and Saskatchewan. (named after their words for: Just to the left of Alberta, The best place in the world, and Who in the world would want to live there.  Oh well, at least it's better than Ontario.  Respectively)  Then, the winter came and thousands of people died and the rest were nearly frozen.  However, they still didn't think to go back because it was so beautiful.  Meanwhile, the man back in the states laughed himself half to death because his crazy friends still hadn't figured out the joke.  He's laughing still.