funny song for the day

Here's your funny Christmas song. I recently (a couple minutes ago) found lots more funny Christmas songs so now it's two a day. Anyway here they are.

Rusty Chevrolet

(To The Tune "Jingle Bells")

Dashing through the snow in my rusty Chevrolet.
Down the road I go, sliding all the way.
I need new piston rings.
I need some new snow tires.
My car is held together by a piece of chicken wire!

Chorus:
Oh, rust and smoke, the heater's broke, the door just blew away.
I light a match to see the dash and then I start to pray-ay.
The frame is bent, the muffler went, the radio's okay.
Oh, what fun it is to drive this rusty Chevrolet!

I went to IGA to get some Christmas cheer.
I just passed up my left front tire and it's gettin' hard to steer.
Speeding down the highway, right past the county cops.
I have to drag my swampers just to get the car to stop.

Chorus:
Oh, rust and smoke, the heater's broke, the door just blew away.
I light a match to see the dash and then I start to pray-ay.
The frame is bent, the muffler went, the radio's okay.
Oh, what fun it is to drive this rusty Chevrolet!

Bouncing through the snowdrifts in a big, blue cloud of smoke.
People laugh as I drive by; I wonder what's the joke!
I have to get to Wal-Mart to pick up my layaway,
Cause Santa's comin' soon in his big, old, rusty sleigh!

Chorus:
Oh, rust and smoke, the heater's broke, the door just blew away.
I light a match to see the dash and then I start to pray-ay.
The frame is bent, the muffler went, the radio's okay.
Oh, what fun it is to drive this rus-ty Chev-ro-let!


Now for funny Christmas song number 2

I Saw Elvis Dressed as Santa Claus

To The Tune "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus")

by The Fibs

Oh, I saw Elvis dressed as Santa Claus

In my home town shopping mall last night.

I knew it must be him

Santa is a very slim. And his sideburns where much darker

Than the whiskers on his chin.
Oh, I saw Elvis dressed as Santa Claus

Hiding under that beard of snowy white.

Then I saw his whiskers slip,

When he curled his lip.

Elvis dressed as Santa Claus last night.

Spoken:Yessiree, I saw Elvis sitting on Santa's throne.

Really I did, and I'm gonna call the Enquirer,

Because after all,

Suspicious minds wanna know.

He had blue suede boots and bells,

You should have seen it for yourselves.

Sung:And did you ever wonder why it is

They call his helpers Elves?
Oh, I saw Elvis dressed as Santa Claus

Hiding under that beard of snowy white.

Oh you can imagine my surprise,

When I saw through his disguise.

Elvis dressed as Santa Claus last night.
Well, I saw Elvis dressed as Santa Claus

In my home town shopping mall last night.

He was sitting in Santa's chair;

little sister pulling on his hair.

And I heard him say, "Now don't be cruel,You’ll get a teddy bear."
Oh, I saw Elvis dressed as Santa Claus

Hiding underneath that beard of snowy white.

Then I saw his whiskers slip,

When he curled his lip.

Elvis dressed as Santa Claus last night.
Well it makes me wanna sing

Blue Christmas like the King.

Elvis dressed as Santa Claus last night.

Elvis here, Elvis there, Elvis everywhere!
I heard him say, "Now don't be cruel,You’ll get a teddy bear."